After a typically crazy week including a midweek trip to NYC for work, I was looking forward to relaxing on Thursday night. Relaxing as in going grocery shopping and catching up on laundry. So I walk in the door from work and Tess utters the words that strike fear into the heart of elementary school moms everywhere "Mom, my head really itches!"
I check her head under my Ott light and my heart sinks, I can't tell if it's just dandruff but there is definitely "stuff" in her hair. Finally I spot one, and after googling, I can confirm, it's head lice! After sending Mario to Walgreen's for RID and throwing all of her bedding in the washing machine, I grill Tess to figure out how she got it. The kids got their hair cut last Saturday so I know she didn't have it then. Also, after a scalp check I can confirm none of the other kids have it and neither do Mario or I. So I zero in on school; did she do anything at school that might have exposed her to lice?
"Ms. H had us wear hats in drama, but she said they were guaranteed lice free," says Tess. "Well Ms. H is a F$#@ing liar," I reply. After calling Ms. H the drama teacher a few more choice words I get down to business and spend the next 2 hours shampooing her with the RID and combing through her hair in 1 inch sections, I find 3 more lice. This is where the OCD comes in handy, I do a very thorough job!
When I tuck Tess into bed, I tell her that sometimes when we're angry we say things we don't mean, so please don't repeat the things I called Ms. H to anyone. Tess says "you mean like when you called her a fing B?" and I say, "yea like that." I email the Principal to suggest that they no longer use the hats in drama, because if they didn't have lice before, I can practically guarantee that they do now. Then I soak my hairbrush in a sink of hot water and Listerine and go to bed. Next morning when I brush my hair, I notice that it smells mintyfresh!